Etiquette is the practice of knowing what to do, what to say and where to look during life events. Rather than being restrictive, having rules for polite behavior can give you emotional support so you know what’s expected and feel good about your choices.
Etiquette is an aspect of culture that varies by country and culture. For example, close friend groups often create more relaxed rules for acceptable behavior, like opening each other’s fridges. However, the goal of etiquette always remains the same – to define and abide by boundaries that show respect for yourself and others.
As society has become more global, it’s become more difficult to know what’s expected in specific situations. A good rule of thumb is to watch others’ behavior and model your own after theirs. However, this can occasionally get you in trouble.
Etiquette doesn’t have to be overwhelming, even with differences in culture and location. Here are seven common situations you may face and how to properly behave for each of them.
Dining Out
Although everyone practices table manners differently, you can follow a few guidelines to show respect everywhere. Here are three rules that govern how to eat politely – whether you’re at a fancy restaurant on a date or relaxing with friends.
- Take Your Time
One of the keys to eating politely is to take your time. Rushing usually leads to mess – either down your front or across your face. You also shouldn’t keep your elbows on the table while eating, and try to avoid bringing your face down to the food.
- Don’t Talk With Your Mouth Full
This is one of the most common dining faux pas and is really gross when you think about it. No one wants to see half-chewed food inside your mouth, and it definitely distracts from what you’re saying. Taking small bites will help you avoid this.
- Wait Until Everyone Is Seated
Although this custom has mostly been lost in American culture, it’s a respectful way to ensure everyone can enjoy their meal together. However, if you’re eating in an informal setting, this rule may draw more attention to you rather than less.
Weddings
Weddings are another type of event with their own set of special rules. However, with a little preparation, you can attend ceremonies confidently either as a guest or a member of the bridal party. Here are three things to remember.
- Check the Dress Code
The bride should have the spotlight at her wedding, so no one else should wear white. It’s also a good idea to check the invitation for any specific dress code instructions since some ceremonies are more formal than others.
- Don’t Bring Extra Guests
Weddings are expensive, and the bride and groom have chosen their guest list very carefully. This means you shouldn’t bring a plus one unless they were specifically included in your invitation. Let the bride and groom decide who will be at their wedding.
- Be Gracious and Supportive
True friends will not be offended if they aren’t chosen to be part of the bridal party. Many brides stress over their choice of bridesmaids because they’re afraid of hurting someone’s feelings. Do your part to support the new couple by being gracious about their decisions.
Funerals
Although attending a funeral is sad, it doesn’t have to be stressful. Bereaved family members just need to know you’re there and you care about them and their departed loved one. Here are a few ways you can show respect at a funeral.
- Don’t Draw Attention
The only funeral where you should get attention is your own. Wearing black and keeping your cell phone silenced are ways you can keep the focus off yourself and on the person whose life you’re celebrating. It’s also important to leave unruly children at home.
- Do Express Your Sympathy
Sending a card or flowers for the funeral is a kind way to show sympathy. However, nothing can replace the power of verbal affirmation and an in-person hug. Even if you don’t know what to say, it’s important to express your condolences as best you can.
- Show Support Afterward
Families grieve for a long time after a funeral. One of the best ways to support friends is to keep checking on them. If you are close, plan to spend extra time with them during the first few months after the funeral. Bringing them food and providing child care can also be helpful.
House Party
You don’t need to have a perfectly clean home or a fully stocked pantry to have people over. A little preparation can make house parties incredibly fun and stress-free for everyone involved. Here are three things to remember when inviting people over.
- Anticipate Guests’ Needs
People are often nervous when coming to a new place for the first time. You can make the process as easy as possible for your guests by directing parking, showing them the bathroom, and anticipating any other needs like food and seating.
- Set a Relaxed Tone
Your house party doesn’t need to be perfect. In fact, the best memories are usually made when something goes wrong or there’s room for improvisation. Your guests will appreciate a clean bathroom, but you don’t need to scour the whole house before they come over.
- Work Ahead of Time
One of the best ways to enjoy your own party is to work ahead of time. Prep food, music, and additional elements for a movie or game night before your friends get there. After they arrive, you’ll be able to sit back and let the night unfold without any stressful distractions.
New Baby
Getting to meet a new baby is incredibly exciting, but there are many factors to consider before you head over to say congratulations. Keep these three things in mind when visiting parents and their new little one.
- Don’t Go if You’re Sick
Babies are more likely than adults to get sick because their immune systems haven’t been exposed to pathogens yet. Many new parents are also at risk because of a lack of sleep. Getting sick is the last thing their family needs during this time.
- Be Respectful of Decisions
Everyone has an opinion on baby names and the best way to raise children. However, parents are entitled to their decisions and need your support, not your criticism. Do what you can to support their choices and affirm their new role as parents.
- Ask to Hold the Baby
Some new parents will be thrilled for you to hold their baby, while others may prefer that you don’t. Everyone feels differently, so it’s respectful to ask before you try to pick up a baby. The same holds true for kissing one.
Practicing Politeness
Proper etiquette may feel like a list of random rules, but its goal is really quite simple. As long as you are considering how your behavior impacts others, you’ll have good manners that make every situation comfortable for everyone involved.
Use these tips to attend special occasions and life events with confidence. Over time, the practice of politeness will turn into an effortless habit that you can carry with you into every new situation.